One of the main reasons I wanted to put together a wedding website was to pass on all the information I learned in planning my own destination wedding.  I had a great deal of trouble finding sound advice on hosting one, as they simply have different needs then a traditional wedding hosted in your home town.   The information bellow may not be complete, but it could be of great help to the many planning destination weddings!  If you have any questions or good advice to add, please send it to me and I'll try to add it in!  Thanks!  Karen 

Why a destination wedding?
Lots of reasons.  My reasons are available by clicking here.   The primary reasons couples choose a destination wedding are to save money, avoid the major hassles of family squabbles and planning details, and of course to have a memorable and unique wedding.  Besides a beautiful location, you can mix in local cultural traditions with your own ceremony to give some excitement and uniqueness to your special day.  And best of all many destination weddings are a bargain compared to the cost of hosting a big expensive event back home.  

As I mentioned as one of my reasons, our family is spread out all over the U.S. but our life and friends are in California.  This is becoming a more and more common scenario for couples, making it difficult to gather everyone together for a large and meaningful celebration.  Because of this I firmly believe destination weddings will keep increasing in popularity!

Choose a location?
To chose your location first do a little research.  The web is always a great resource for research of any kind.  One great site is www.worldbride.com, but it is just the beginning of what's available. Most wedding magazines feature destination wedding information in the back pages.  Travel sections in bookstores is another great place to research a location.  Your travel agent may be able to recommend a few good choices based on your budget and travel date.  Having a wedding during the slow season can save you and your guests a small bundle on travel!  But most importantly research the legal requirements.  You may need to bring specific paperwork, there may be have a waiting period or other requirements that may change your plans. 

The popularity of Destination Weddings have increased tremendously and its now estimated that over 100,000 couples a year will have one!  In the United States Las Vegas and Disney World are two very popular locations, and both have a seemingly unlimited supply of resources and ideas.  European weddings are also becoming popular.  There you can marry in an old castle, at a vineyard in France, or on a cliff in Ireland with bagpipes sounding off in the background.  Tropical islands are the most popular location for a destination wedding, and Maui is currently the number one island of choice.  Other very popular locations are Jamaica and St. Lucia, as well as other Hawaiian islands (Big Island and Oahu mostly).  Luckily, that means lots of resources on the island for you.  

Available resources are important to keep in mind when picking a location.  If you want to have a ceremony performed in a certain religion, or you feel strong that you must have a great photographer that specializes in black and white, or a musician that plays a particular instrument, be sure the location can accommodate your needs.  

Often couples choose locations where they will also have their honeymoon, or be a short flight away from their honeymoon location.  

Planning an entire week with guests?
How to juggle guests for an entire week (or more!) is certainly more challenging then trying to keep them entertained for part of a day.  The most common solution I've found is to simply organize a loose agenda of activities, including golf games, luaus, dinners or what ever else is popular at that location.  Stager the days so some events are inexpensive, such as snorkeling and relaxing at such-and-such beach with a BBQ.  Be sure to let every guest know about the agenda well ahead of time, if there are any fee's or advanced sign-ups required, if kids can attend, and then let them decide on how to spend their time.  If you want to change plans for a day, do keep your guests informed the best you can.  For our wedding we are making sure everyone knows that attending an event is not mandatory.  (Well, besides the wedding!)   Many couples are also making sure they get some alone time and a real honeymoon, either by staying longer then the guests or traveling to a different location.  Regardless, do not forget to give yourself some alone time!

When planning your event do keep your guests needs in mind.  Finding group rates for airfare and hotel will be appreciated more then you know.  Sending them literature and travel information is a wonderful touch too.   

Lastly, do not feel obligated to pay for any of your guests travel costs.   It is a nice gesture if you can afford it, but it is not necessary nor is it considered tradition to do so.  With that said, *some* couples will pay for their closest relatives to attend (such as their parents).  

How to do invitations?
Invitations or Announcements
The issue we struggled with most was the invitation.  Truth is destination weddings are such a new concept, there really isn't any set rules on how this should or shouldn't be handled.  We had a lot of questions and we couldn't find any answers.  Particularly, is it presumptuous or rude to invite people to our wedding when we know they can't attend? But then again, would it be rude if we didn't invite them knowing that they are close to us?? Would we just be wasting our money on invitations knowing full well that only a few people would actually attend? Shouldn't we use both invitations and announcements?  But if we use announcements, wont that just add to the costs by having to print both invitations AND announcements??  Where do we draw the line on who gets an invitation and who gets an announcement? 

From what I have read, couples handle the invitation situation with different solutions.   Most couples are concerned with being fare with who gets an invitation and who gets an announcement.  It can be a difficult line to draw, especially when you realize you will be spending a lot of time with who ever does attend.  That may be a wonderful thought, or it may not.   Some couples will only send invites to those who have verbally announced they will attend, then everyone else gets an announcement.  Some couples just avoid doing both, and will simply send a separate invitation to any follow up celebrations.   Other couples do what we did, and choose special wording on the invitation that 'doubles' as both an invite and an announcement.  The formality of your event, your situation with your potential guests, and your budget will primarily dictate how you resolve this situation. 

Since we are going to host a few celebrations when we return, and we are not trying to deter anyone from attending our wedding, we chose to send everyone invitations.  We also personally felt that 'being invited' to a wedding was more meaningful to our guests then simply 'being informed'.  The wording on our invitation was key to pulling this off,  and it saved us the money from having to print both invitations and announcements.  ( Buying extra invitations in bulk is much cheaper then printing two separate items).  I found a phrase from another bride that seamed to work just great, and it can be reworded depending if you or your parents are hosting the event.   On our invitation we had an opening phrase, then after that we wrote: "We invite you join us in presence or in thought as we become husband and wife".  Then we listed our names "Karen Hull & Scott Petersen will exchange marriage vows ocean-side on Thursday, the twenty-ninth of June Two Thousand at five o'clock in the evening".  Then we list the location with address, and the words "A sunset dinner reception to follow" on the invitation too.  By using these words "in presence or in thought" we felt  it took the obligation to attend out of the invitation and doubled as an announcement. 
 
Enclosures for the celebrations back home
One other thing I've come across plenty is that apparently it is technically incorrect to word any of the follow up celebrations as a reception, unless of course you are completely re-doing your vows.  So, to keep with proper etiquette we worded ours as celebrations.  For our celebration in Iowa, the words I chose on our enclosure was simply "Celebration with Dinner and Dance on Saturday, the second of September....location..."   For our celebration in California (which will be a day picnic) I worded it "Celebration with Food and Games on Saturday, the twenty-ninth of July...location..." I also noted at the bottom of both enclosures "further details at www.geocities.com/mauiwedding".  But of course we still enclosed a mini-map for those who do not have access to the web.

Reply Card
Our reply card was larger then what's average so we had room to write the phrase "we look forward to celebrating with you" on the top, then the rest simply said "Please kindly respond with location".  We had check-off names for " __Hawaii __California__Iowa __Unable to attend"  Then we asked for their "Name_______________ & Number of persons___". If you need more information, such as dinner choice "beef or chicken", squeeze it in. Just make sure its relevant information as you are limited on space!   

Engagement photos
Not that it's mandatory, but if you have a bunch of those wallet size engagement photos now is the time to send them!  We included them in many of our invitations.  

The ceremony & reception?
This is where you can mix traditions or create your own.  Talk to your coordinator about all the local wedding traditions as you may want to include them.   And don't worry about what other people generally do, this is your day so make it special!  

 Many destination weddings are small, and receptions can often be held at a restaurant.  Others include a private location with catered food and hired entertainment.  Use your imagination, ask your coordinator a ton of questions, and never forget that its your special day!  

How do we get my dress there, and what about the tux??
This is one more reason why you should get a wedding coordinator, as you can Fed-X your dress to him in advance, if you so wish.   Many brides do take it as carry on luggage, but BE SURE it is proper size.   One bride I know personally had to fight like H@%% with the airline not to have to check it in as luggage!!  It was simply too big as she had his tux and other items in the bag.  They were also flying during a very busy time of the year, so the airplane did not have extra room for oversized carry on pieces.  

As far as tuxedo's go, you can either rent it at your wedding location or bring it with you.  Your coordinator can help find a good tuxedo rental place.  However, depending on your location you may or may not have a large selection to choose from.  If you really don't want to risk wearing a tux you don't like, bring one with you.  Have one of your guests bring it back and return it for you if you plan to stay a long time. 

Once there, work with your coordinator to get the dress and tux pressed and perfect for your wedding day.

How can I take my pet with me?
It's a crazy question, but it's more common then you think.  More and more people are including their pets in their ceremony, and they are often treated as a regular part of the family.  (We wanted to take our two little Norfolk Terriers to Maui with us!) Traveling with your pet will be difficult for multiple reasons.  You need to buy them a ticket which averages $100 round trip per pet.  To get the ticket your animal will need a clean bill of health from the vet, or its not going to fly the friendly skies with you.  You animal will also need to be in an approved carrier.  Most pet stores carry such items. Animals under 20 pounds can usually be carried on, but over 20 pounds they will have to be checked in like luggage.  The bad part is most of these popular locations do not allow pets once you get there.  Hawaii has a strict policy of placing all animals in a 30 day quarantine when they arrive, and a few more months of 'house arrest' after words!   I've read that certain Caribbean islands may allow you to fly your animal into their country, but there isn't a hotel on the island that will allow pets.   And lets not forget about those certain countries where your animal may be looked at as a food dish.  Is all this really worth it just to have your pet with you?  Most animals prefer the comforts of their own home.  If you can leave them in the care of some close friends who remained back home, they will be healthy and happy when you return.